Tag »
jennifer lopez

La Lopez es muy patético

Posted by Justin on June 5th, 2010 | No Comments

This is just sad. Albeit not unexpected, but still sad. Jennifer Lopez opened up the World Music Awards 2010 recently and was dreadful. She tries to impress us with her pole dancing, or cane dancing, and her craptastic medley of songs that WERE hits, but upon reflection, I can’t tell why they reached the top of the charts or thereabouts. Despite a recent hit film, her music career is worse than…anybody else, really. RuPaul has better hit songs than La Lopez. Even though her love doesn’t cost a thing, I still don’t want it. She actually will now have to pay me to accept her love, music, films or the belief that her marriage is great. And where is that Love? album anyways…

This is a song about control.

Posted by Justin on January 29th, 2010 | 1 Comment

Now, this isn’t news. Beyonce needs to take a mutha f-ing break. I feel at the rate she’s churning out music, she’s approaching that JLO stratosphere of “Nah, we’re gonna hate you for the rest of your life no matter what you do.” And that would be shameful, since Beyonce has talent whereas aforementioned La-Lopez does not has a lot of OTHER hobbies like babies. So let this be the warning: Beyonce – shape up because you about to expire. Hokay?

I was deleting a lot of my Beyonce library, pairing it down to the essentials and not the superfluous awful tracks that made up most of Dangerously in Love. It’s the same process I employ when getting a new Janet Jackson album and finding that without 18 interludes, there’s about 6 or 7 tracks in totality. Reedick.

However, scouring through the tracks I came across this gem of an unreleased, leaked demo, supposedly produced by Stargate, although it sounds to me so similar to Kylie’s In My Arms. And if Beyonce made an album of ess like this, I’d eat it up with a glowstick spoon once I got my rave pacifier out of my mouth. So go ahead, listen and lose control:

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.